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UFOs Explained


Prologue:  95+% of UFO sightings have been debunked as hoaxes, optical illusions or hallucinations.  This webpage deals with the remaining 5%.


UFOs Explained Before the Term UFO Existed

It was 1943, the middle of World War Two.  I was five years old, and my teenage sister was out on a Friday nite date, after her boyfriend had sworn to bring her home by eleven.  Blackout laws were in effect in order to make it more difficult for enemy bombers find potential targets.  Most of our apartment windows were covered by proper heavy curtains, the others by heavy blankets.  There was no TV, so I entertained myself by reading books and comic books with a flashlight under the blanket, or listening to radio mysteries and adventures like The Shadow and Gangbusters.  On this particular evening I decided to play a prank on my sister.  I had been given a fantastic new toy, a fancy flashlight made in Germany circa 1936.  I could adjust the focus of the beam and change among colors with filters for yellow (white?), red and green.  I went into the living room, turned off all other lights and played with my new toy shining the beam all over a large wall.  Soon enough Linda was kissing her boyfriend good night, and fumbling for the keyhole.  As she was entering the pitch black apartment, she was confronted with an eerie red glow on the wall and my attempt to sound like a ghost with a crude “boo”.  There was a few seconds of dead silence, followed with a high pitch scream which seemed to last for at least a minute.  Linda did not speak to me for a week, but I was not reprimanded inasmuch our parents thought that a teenager should not have fallen for such a childish gag.

I could use my flashlight to make “spots” of light of various sizes on the dark wall.  I could make the spots disappear in one location and appear in another location.  I could make it move very fast even with a zig-zag or saw-tooth motion.  In a word, and in retrospect, I could make a spot of light do things totally impossible for something/anything with a Non-Zero Mass.

 The purpose here is not to present a lesson in The Physics of Light.  Isaac Newton did that for me centuries ago.  Today, the unexplainable UFO phenomena has been reduced to things which can be shown, at least in principle to be of Zero mass.  Sure, shiny objects on a dark background explain many things.  But, dark objects on a light background (eg, daytime) may also be explained, again at least in principle, by well known scientific principles.  Repeat after me:  ZERO MASS.  (QED)

UFO Related Mysteries Debunked

What about The Aliens [Extraterrestial UFO drivers and riders] then, you ask.  What about all those Little Grays, Greens, Purples ad nauseam, beings that people in Roswell and elsewhere have "seen"?  These questions are almost too easy answer.  Each can be answered with a single phrase:  CRASH TEST DUMMIES and HALLUCINATORS.

Still you persist.  Why then have the American scientists not made this clear to the American public?  Why kill the goose that lays golden eggs, I reply.  American scientists and military leaders roll over with laughter every day they show up in their labs and offices knowing that Russian Commnists hava batallions of highly decorated Comrades on huge projects, wastsing enormous resources, trying to fit natural disaster sites into UFO theories.  And they sound oh so serious and "edjikated" in Pravda and Isvestia newsclips.

Real UFOs or UFPs or UFIs?

The problems with UFOs are not just many, they exist on many different levels.  For example, consider the dictionary definition of object:

object  --  a material thing that can be seen and touched.

Clearly, the term UFO is biased toward material things, things that have some finite mass.  Conversely, UFO is biased against non-material things such as phenomena consisting of Zero Mass light "particles", aka photons, and hallucinations.

Hey, is it too late to prpose at least two new terms, UFPs and UFI?

Unidentified Flying Phenomena

Unidentified Flying Illusions

Boy, am I fatigued.  What say, we postpone considering equally curious phrases such as UNIDENTIFIED Floating, Swimming, Crawling, Burrowing, and Jst Lolligagging About OBJECTS.



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  Copyright © 1998 Mike Titus.  All rights reserved.  .....  Wednesday, 08 April 2015